Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize
