weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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