I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
