So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize