I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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