I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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