after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
