Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
