Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
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