I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Randomize
