i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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