I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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