Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
