He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize