3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
