My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
