who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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