Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
