Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
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