NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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