Don't make out with my wife yet
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize
