Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
