HIV tests are more positive than that guy
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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