Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
a search helicopter?!
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
