Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
