If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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