No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I AM VODKA MAN
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Randomize
