If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Randomize
