how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
