Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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