My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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