hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
