Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
