Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize