my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
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There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
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I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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