I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize