I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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