Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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