Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
