plz talk dirty to me
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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