dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Randomize
