He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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