dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
It's just like the Real World with babies
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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