I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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