It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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