You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Are we in a gay sports bar?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
