Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
