gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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