If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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