Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
